Dear Naughty and Nice-
This hot guy at church asked for my number and never called. The next week, he asked for it again, so I gave it to him again. The next week, he said he lost it and asked for it again, and I gave it to him, again. Why doesn’t he call? He’s obviously interested, he approached me.
Sincerely, Triple Digits
Dear Triple digits,
Hate to be cliché, but he's just not that into you! There're a million stupid reasons why guys ask for your number and never call. Mainly it all boils down to because they can. This loser should be embarrassed to ask you for your number three times. Unfortunately you should be embarrassed that you gave it to him three times. Wake up girl! If this is how he starts the relationship, how do you think the rest of it would be? If he asks you for your number again tell him; "I only gave it to you the 2nd and 3rd time to see if you were actually as ridiculous as I suspected. But now the joke’s old, so sorry." And p.s. some of the biggest players go to church. They have a lot of repenting to do!
-NAUGHTY
Dear Triple Digits-
Just like our prison system’s 3 strike rule, I think you’re being too lenient. I rarely give my name twice, much less my number – it’s too hard to get from me in the first place! To be fair, there are exceptions to the rule, just don’t make the exception the rule. I’m sorry to say you’ve been had. Guys do not lose numbers to girls they like. Have you ever felt in need of validation? That was he was doing; seeking validation. And you gave it to him, in multiples. Do yourself a favor: next time he asks, tell him he can go home alone and validate himself all he wants - without you.
-NICE
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
HOOK UP HANG UPS
Dear Naughty and Nice-
Why don’t women sleep with everyone they want to? Do they wait out of shame? Are they afraid to be labeled? If I want to hook up with a hot chick, I have no problem, why do women?
Sincerely, Sleeps Around
Dear Sleeps Around-
Women don’t have a “problem”, we have “reasons”:
On a medical level: we’re letting you come into our house – a man enters and leaves us little gifts: yeast infections, potential babies, STD’s. Yes, there are condoms, but they sometimes break just like hearts. Also, bonding chemicals release in our brains when we orgasm. Evolution chose this, not us. We don’t want to get attached to someone who’s had his fun and is ready to run. Ever hear of a crazy ex-girlfriend? Guess who makes us crazy?
On a moral level: we’re still a puritanical society. We judge ourselves, we judge others, we judge the way others judge us. Men sleep around and are “Bachelors,” women who do are "Sluts.” And while men want to sleep with a woman with experience, he’s hesitant to marry that woman.
On a final level: we don’t want to sleep with you as often as you think we do. There aren’t that many good guys; so even though you may want to sleep with us, we often don’t give you a second thought. So, maybe we DO sleep with whoever the hell we want to; maybe it’s just not YOU.
-NICE
Dear Sleeps Around,
I’m gonna have to go with Nice on this one: 1970 called, they want you back. It's called STDs, ever heard of them? And may I recommend you make a trip to the clinic today. Just know this; when a girl says no, she not saying "I don't love sex, I’m not horny," she’s really saying, “I got to get out of here and get to my vibrator before I explode!"
-NAUGHTY
Why don’t women sleep with everyone they want to? Do they wait out of shame? Are they afraid to be labeled? If I want to hook up with a hot chick, I have no problem, why do women?
Sincerely, Sleeps Around
Dear Sleeps Around-
Women don’t have a “problem”, we have “reasons”:
On a medical level: we’re letting you come into our house – a man enters and leaves us little gifts: yeast infections, potential babies, STD’s. Yes, there are condoms, but they sometimes break just like hearts. Also, bonding chemicals release in our brains when we orgasm. Evolution chose this, not us. We don’t want to get attached to someone who’s had his fun and is ready to run. Ever hear of a crazy ex-girlfriend? Guess who makes us crazy?
On a moral level: we’re still a puritanical society. We judge ourselves, we judge others, we judge the way others judge us. Men sleep around and are “Bachelors,” women who do are "Sluts.” And while men want to sleep with a woman with experience, he’s hesitant to marry that woman.
On a final level: we don’t want to sleep with you as often as you think we do. There aren’t that many good guys; so even though you may want to sleep with us, we often don’t give you a second thought. So, maybe we DO sleep with whoever the hell we want to; maybe it’s just not YOU.
-NICE
Dear Sleeps Around,
I’m gonna have to go with Nice on this one: 1970 called, they want you back. It's called STDs, ever heard of them? And may I recommend you make a trip to the clinic today. Just know this; when a girl says no, she not saying "I don't love sex, I’m not horny," she’s really saying, “I got to get out of here and get to my vibrator before I explode!"
-NAUGHTY
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